Kell's Hell

...the nonsensical ramblings of a lunatic mind...

The Windward Witch
20 October 1967

Donations for Kelleigh

56. Yea, we shall conquer death and Hell together.
57. And the earth is mine.

I'm so vain, I probably think this blog is about me.

Go on; "Friend" me. I dare ya.
I have a potty mouth, and I am not afraid to use it. I will be profane here, as well as profound. I will rant. I will whine. I will inundate you with memes and stupid videos. They'll at least be entertaining. Least to me. I will post nauseatingly cutesy anecdotes about my dogs and cat, precious enough to give you night sweats. I will bitch about my sex life. I will speak of politics AND religion. It's my journal.

Creative Commons License
This work by Kell Crow (Kelleigh Crowley) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Intellect without a sense of humor is boring to me. Humor without intellect is just freaking sad. ...Except for South Park.


I am from New Orleans. Being from New Orleans is the one thing I do really well. I love my town more than I love you. Don't ever ask me to pick.

I do not want to date you. I can screw up my personal life just fine on my own, thanks. Been doing it for years. I am an educated, politically aware, non-white, bisexual, polyamorous witch (Wooo, scary!) And I vote! If you are homophobic, paganphobic, genderphobic, politicophobic, sociophobic, raciophobic, ...or just plain phobic... just save us both some time and frustration and go elsewhere. Likewise if your belief system includes a condemnation of the teachings of others; restrictions to what someone besides yourself is able to do with their body; or absolute obeisance without wavering, to the dictates of your leaders... Just Go. You will hate me, and I will destroy you with words you do not understand.
...Coversely, if you are creative, unrestrained, erotic, impetuous, apocalyptic, irreverent, and just a bit sinister, what in the world are you doing still reading this? Message me already! I'm willing to meet anybody who is not afraid to defy their cultural standard. Anybody who is not afraid to laugh at funerals. Anybody who is not afraid to call me a bitch! Endearing to me is Honesty, Passion, Humor, Strength, Irony, Wisdom, Witticism, Cynical Idealism, Jaunty Nihilism, Insight, Candor, Honor. Repellent to me; Apathy, Stubborn Ignorance, Racism, Arrogance, Dullness, Futility, Passivity, Insecurity, Unenlightenment.

..TL, DR??? GTFO..! I edit for nobody. ;)

"Stay Away From That One, Paw; She's Got...Powers..."

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I am a Spiritualist, Writer, Gourmet Cook, Duchess, Bartender, Singer, World Traveler, Pirate, and Goddess; not necessarily in that order. I am a lifelong student and sometime teacher of those arcane, spooky, and damnable wisdom of them horrible pre-Jehovan nekkid devil-people... and I can build a BAD ASS gumbo. I am a butcher, a baker, and a candlestick maker.
I will chase you if you run. If you chase me, I will kick you. I occupy my time illuminating the masses, drinking in bars, singing, writing erotica, whipping up gourmet feasts for the worthy, doing yoga and tai chi, walking Napoleon Bonaparte around on a leash, and causing a general nuisance. I can never find a pair of shoes that I like, or a decent set of cutlery.


I do not have much sympathy; but I've got a killer sense of humor. I'm not here to coddle anybody, especially if I think they have a dumb idea, a destructive habit, or are wearing an ugly hat {Unless they are damned proud of that fuck-ugly hat..!). I am no enabler, and I am not going to tell you Oh that's okay, it's not your fault, or Aww poor baby. I am going to tell you Well, quit your ineffectual yowling and tell me how I can help you DO something about it! I have an enormous sense of loyalty and devotion, and there is virtually nothing I wouldn't do for those whom I consider my Family. But I can also be very selfish and unreasonable. I like my privacy, and I can be a downright cunt (I don't care if you get offended by the word "Cunt". Cunt, Cunt, Cunt. If you do, we'd probably not get along anyway) at times. I get stubborn. I get pissy. I sulk when I don't get my way. I become incensed and I blather and rage, at the horrible injustices of...Whatever. I get offended and outraged. I rant. I get over it. The friend who can get me to laugh at myself at those times, is a friend for whom I would hide a body (thankfully, I am fortunate enough to be blessed with a few who are still willing to humor me).
I certainly have my share of quirks, odd beliefs, annoying habits, and daily rituals. I love every single one of them. I have reasons for every single one of them. This is not to say they are not stupid or bothersome to others. It is to say one would be hard pressed to get me to change them. Because they make me happy. And because I rock. Just don't ever let me catch you putting a book/movie/cd of mine someplace other than where it belongs. And don't drink all the coffee.

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I am Jill's inflated ego
I love coffee, good incense, pretty, shiny things, and a good movie-and by good I mean bad. I love really bad movies. Like House Of 1000 Corpses or Tales From The Crypt. Or Fight Club. My musical tastes are so, so vast, and I've rambled on enough... The "Cliff's notes": Industrial, Goth, Electronica/Techno, Blues, Jazz, Funk, Rockabilly, Gothabilly, Psychobilly, Punk, Metal, Classic Rock, Folk, 80's Crap, Classical, Celtic, Middle Eastern, and even some Country. See, vast. Told ya.
One can often find me, during festival times, belly-dancing to myriad drums on the streets of the Faubourg Marigny, dressed as a houri, a fury, or something out of Dante's Inferno.

I cannot play the harpsichord.

"We have done the impossible, and that makes us mighty."
~ Malcolm Reynolds

"Choose carefully, listen well to those demons within and never falter. It’s all part of the Devil’s game."

- Blanche Barton

Bad Joke:So, a grasshopper goes into a bar. Bartender says, 'Hey- I've got a drink named after you!' Grasshopper says, 'Really? You got a drink named Steve?'
REALLY Bad Joke:Why did Jesus die on the cross? Because he forgot the safe word.

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